How to Kickstart A Daily Journaling Habit for Kids

July 12, 2019

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How to Kickstart A Daily Journaling Habit for Kids

“The starting point of discovering who you are, your gifts, your talents, your dreams, is being comfortable with yourself. Spend time alone. Write in a journal.” -- Robin Sharma

As part of my Leadership4Kids Program, I ask each child to keep a journal for 90 days. One of the most common questions I get from parents is, “Daily journaling is a great idea, and I can definitely see how it could benefit my child. But I can’t even get them to brush their teeth every day, how do I help them develop this daily journaling habit?”

That’s a great question, and there’s no simple answer to that because every child is different. However, there are certain principles I have seen that work well for most kids. Here are some simple tips, the do’s and don’ts, that you might find useful.

THE THREE DOS

1.     Do make it easy and fun with specific prompts.

There are different journals available, and one can even use a blank piece of paper. I don’t recommend using this approach for kids, as anyone who tried to write knows what a daunting task it is. Somehow, the act of staring at a blank sheet of paper can seem intimidating.

You can use generic gratitude journals with a simple prompt such as, ”Today, I am grateful for...” This might work for some children, but based on what I have seen over the years, kids need something much more specific, especially in the beginning.

What do I mean by specific? Here are some examples from the “I AM A LEADER – a 90-Day LeadershipJournal for Kids.”

-       Appreciate the first person you saw when you got up this morning.  This prompt is very specific. Nothing abstract here and this prompt usually leads to an appreciation for one of the parents.

-       Appreciate something you threw away in the trash can earlier today. Again, a very specific prompt, which leads children to be more mindful about what they throw away.

-       Appreciate someone you helped today. Although you helped this person, can you come up with a reason why helping him/her is the same as helping yourself? Very specific, again, which leads children to think about the reciprocal nature of cooperation and collaboration.

-       Appreciate the last time you took a nice nap. Another very specific prompt, which leads children to appreciate the importance of rest in their life.

You get the idea. Do make it easy and fun for your child so he or she can focus on doing the appreciation, rather than thinking about what to appreciate.  After a few weeks, this will become second nature for them.

2.     Do it EVERY day.

The key to success for your child is to journal every day. Yes, that includes weekends and vacations come rain or shine. It’s essential journaling becomes a daily practice; otherwise, it’s not going to stick. 

I often tell parents, don’t worry about how much time their child spends journaling. If it’s five minutes, great. If it’s thirty seconds, that’s great too. There will be days they write a lot because there are things inside of them that want to come out, and some days, they might only write two words. That’s all perfectly okay as long as they spend a few moments doing it every day, mission accomplished.

3.     Do set a good example.

Quite a few parents tell me that they found it useful to do daily journaling together with their children, especially for the first couple of weeks. If you think about it, that makes perfect sense. In this day and age, children crave simple, laid-back, and quality time with their parents. Journaling is a great way to spend some time together towards the end of the day.

Also, as we all know, children learn by example. If they see you do it, they are more likely to do it themselves. Most, especially from the ages of eight to twelve, admire and want to please their parents. If they see you are spending a few moments journaling every day, they will too.

THE THREE DON'TS

1.     Don’t reward them.

I am not a big fan of “rewards” schemes - such as if you do it for a week, you get a toy, ice cream or something like that.

I am a believer in developing good habits for the sake of developing good habits. It’s important children understand they are doing something good for themselves, and not for their parent; so, please resist the urge to reward them for doing the journal.

So what can you do if they do a good job? When you see them journaling, smile and appreciate them for doing it. Especially if they feel the urge to share something with you, thank them for sharing their feelings and thoughts. Yes, appreciation goes a long way.

2.     Don’t be nosy.

It's hard not to, but resist the urge to check up on them or read what they wrote every time they do their journal. Your job is to help them build a daily habit, that is it. No child wants more homework or like the feeling of being monitored. That approach will surely backfire on you.

Their daily journal is one place that you want them to feel they are at ease, so give them that sacred space to be who they are and let them reflect and explore on their own.

3.     Don’t force it.

At the end of the day, it’s their journaling practice. As a parent, your goal is to help them build a good daily habit. That’s it. Resist the urge to even comment on it.  The fact you are looking into this tells me that you are an amazing parent already. You care about developing leadership skills and good habits. So don’t force it upon them. Your goal is to get to a point where they want to journal without you saying a word. You definitely don’t want your child to think they are doing it for you because that defeats the purpose.

So, there you go. A few simple dos and don’ts that I have seen work well for many parents and their children.  Give them a try and let me know how they work for you.